Shame and Confusion at the Dysfunction Junction

Bonnywood Manor

Willy, left: “I heard what people are saying about the wretched thing you did, and I just want you to know that I’m here for you, even if you really did the wretched thing. Because friends support friends, especially if that supporting involves one of the friends holding the other friend in an intimate manner, something I have dreamed about since that time I was your coach on the high school wrestling team.”

Jimmy Brian, center: “I’m just so torn up about it. I can’t believe that I made such a terrible mistake. It’s just like that time I was wrestling Virgil Clambaker from the Hooterville team and I accidentally grabbed his hooter. I’m so mortified. Maybe I should just stay in this bar forever and keep drinking.”

Hank, right: “Now, now. Don’t be gettin’ so worked up about that hooter-grabbin’ match. I was all the way up in the…

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