What the taint-tickle is happening, all you closet freaks who’ve experienced a pleasurable brush on your nerve-rich strip of No Man’s Land and bitten your lip, unsure of whether to encourage your paramour or flagellate yourself with a nine-tailed scou—
Come ON, dude! It’s 2020! Civilization’s on the brink of collapse! Forget the taint-play—you should be comfortable with a string of apple-sized anal-beads! Quit being a prude!
Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my books and my podcast! If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo! If you simply want to hear me run my suckhole…
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